Law Professor Lateraling 101: Part 10 (“Should I Stay or Should I Go Now?”)
posted by Paul Secunda
More than just the song that I sang (poorly) to my wife at our wedding some ten years ago, the title of this post is the ultimate question you must answer in this lateral market process.
For some, the answer will be easy. The new school represents a jump in prestige, more research funding, better geographic location for family, a spouse has found a new job, or a family member is ill. Or it might be that you just can’t stand the people you work with anymore (and, BTW, they can’t stand you either). I know nothing about this last point.
But for some, the answer is not that easy at all. When I received my first lateral offer last year, it was a school that was basically on the same prestige level, in the same part of the country, and only slighter closer to my wife or my families. Another big issue for us, the presence of a religious community (more fellow Members of the Tribe) was also only slightly better.
In these types of situations, I think it behooves you to have a heart-to-heart with your current dean. Honestly explain the situation. This is an important conversation because not only do you want to see if the outstanding offer permits you to gain some perks through your newly-found leverage, but also it is nice to know whether or not you are truly valued by your institution.
Consider the following responses and tell me which one you would rather hear: “Congratulations. They are sure lucky to have a scholar and teacher on your level. Now, will you close the door. I was just in the middle of a record-breaking minesweeper game.” Or: “Wow [crying hysterically]. That really sucks for me and the school. I will do anything, short of dressing in opposite sex clothing or agreeing to student parking, to get you to stay here. Please. PLEASE!!!”
Now, it is unlikely you will get either of these exact responses from your dean, but before you start negotiation with him or her against the other offer, ask yourself how much you really want to stay at your current institution. And how much you really want to stay at your current institution probably depends on how you are treated there. I would not even bother seeking a counter-offer if you know that you are not staying.
Some might argue that even if you really don’t think there is much of a chance of staying at your current school, you should still see what you can get from your dean in order to play that off the offer from the other school. You could do that, but I would not recommend it. First of all, the law professor community exists in a very small world and it may get out that you played off the two sides when your decision was always clear. Also, if you engage in this type of hard bargaining only to leave your old school, you might not leave on good terms. And as I have told Dan Solove once if not a thousand times, “Don’t burn bridges unless you absolutely have to. You should have not shown your feelings by drenching that person in your sputum.”
So for me, because my first lateral offer did not present me with an obvious decision, I did have a talk with my dean and we worked out a package which would both increase my standing in the faculty and clearly established for me that I was valued by my institution. I did not then go back and re-negotiate with the other school, I just turned down that offer.
On the other hand, this year the offer I received was better in a way that my current school could not compete against. Better for religious reasons, better as far as being in an urban area, and better because of the nature of the law I teach and the fact that people in these parts still have trouble telling the different between unionism, communism, and homosexuality. So this time, although I think I came to fair terms with the dean at my new school, I did not come back and seek to get a better offer at my current school. I just told my dean that I was leaving (and be sure you tell the two involved deans first before making it public news because you never exactly know where that Leiter guy lurks) and appreciated all the school had done for me for the last six years.
And because mutual respect still exists on both sides, my last months here at Ole Miss have been pleasant (except for the raspberries I have been getting from colleagues who have had to take over my committee assignments). My thoughts now turn to such trivialities as selling my home, buying a home, figuring out where to place the kids in school, and basically starting my life over (and that of my family’s) from scratch. Also they turn to how in the hell am I going to survive mountains of snow and treacherous, icy roads come next winter?
All of this is no big deal after one survives the lateral market. Really, the whole things is like American Gladiators for law professors, with Volokh and Balkin instead of Fury and Wolf.
February 15, 2008 at 11:56 am
Posted in: Law School (Hiring & Laterals)
Print This Post
Responses (7)
Paul Horwitz - February 15, 2008 at 12:18 pm
Dude — you sang “Should I Stay Or Should I Go” to your wife at your WEDDING? I’m sure it was romantic and stuff, but was that exactly the moment to express doubt and indecision in song?
Seriously now, good series, Paul.
Paul - February 15, 2008 at 12:25 pm
I’m happy to report, Paul, that Mindy never had the chance to answer the song’s question because I so fouled up the lyrics that it sounded something like: “Should I stay or la la la la . . .exactly who I’m supposed to be. . . don’t even know which clothes fit me.”
I think she was more worried about my mental health than anything else.
See you soon in Chapel Hill where we can continue to impale the Garcetti vampire with wooden stakes!
Bruce Boyden - February 15, 2008 at 5:02 pm
Also they turn to how in the hell am I going to survive mountains of snow and treacherous, icy roads come next winter?
They’re predicting another 12 inches for Sunday. On the plus side, I hear this year is atypical.
Joseph Slater - February 15, 2008 at 10:07 pm
Paul:
Any video clips of that singing you would like to share? A little editing and it would be YouTube gold. Maybe even without any editing. . . .
Maryland Conservatarian - February 16, 2008 at 1:37 pm
“…and the fact that people in these parts still have trouble telling the different between unionism, communism, and homosexuality.”
But come November, I’ll bet they’ll have no trouble telling the difference between “hope…audacity…change” and “substance”.
(and does gratuitously slamming the local populace still keep the Bridges smoke-free?)
David Case - February 16, 2008 at 1:45 pm
Dude — you’ve been watching American Gladiators? Increased committee work raspberries are nothing next to knowing the names of spandex wearing American Gladiators raspberries.
Chris - February 18, 2008 at 5:08 pm
I clicked on the first link, hoping it would be Paul singing. Alas, no.
Also, I’m with David: I say we call you Fury until you leave.
Leave a Reply